Antics of a Poet

my wants & my needs mingle between your lips

like life escaping lungs

You breathe me in

I breathe you out

my veins bleed the silhouette of your last name

as we develop photographic poetry in dark rooms with our souls

I feel my heart flutter to the rhythm of your words

as you speak future into existence

And there is no logic,

but who said I give a damn about logic anyway

#diaryofadayumpoet

#eBook #melanieyeyocarter #poetry #diaryofadayumpoet

NEW RELEASE

My eBook, “All The Madness… All The Love”, will be available for purchase & download at 12:00 am. Links will be posted #diaryofadayumpoet

16/30 Extraordinary Stories *first draft*

As an avid reader, I’ve noticed that most extraordinary stories

originate from humble or dark beginnings

And most foundations are built with blocks of experience

& hard lessons serve as the mortar that will hold our souls together in the future

I was born October 29, 1984

& my hard lessons began early in life…

When 2pac died in September of 1996, I was only 11 years old

But the design of my spirit’s blueprint had already been altered by the first monster

I ever saw with the nerve to come out of the closet

So, with my immature mind, I had to find a way to deal with being a rape victim

This happened before I was even allowed to stay outside until the street lights came on

By the time I turned 13,

I had decided that trying to hold on to something that had already been taken from me

was completely unnecessary & pointless

I would never see virginity again so I dove into sex as if it were an ocean

I was dying to drown in

In October 1999, I was 15

& my body count was so high that it had already became a secret

I buried in my back yard like corpses

My mind & my emotions were both crime scenes people stared at without

reporting them to the proper authorities so there was no yellow tape

There was no proper investigation because no one saw that the child in me was missing

& there were no milk cartons for girls like me

When they looked at me, I guess all they could see was the mistake I had become

Over the years, I was repeatedly identified as a statistic

Rape victim

Pregnant teenager

Mother of the unborn

Abused wife

Single parent

Mistress

A person who attempted suicide…

And the list goes on

I was a walking Lifetime movie reflecting everything that’s wrong with humanity

Flashback…

It’s 1996 & I’m 11 years old in the 5^th grade

And I have to write a poem for my literature assignment

So, I write down the agony hidden in my chest & I turn it in with shaking hands

The next day marked the first time someone told me my pain was beautiful

That day marked the first time someone encouraged me to write

And when I turned 13…I was still writing

When I turned 15…I was still writing

16

20

I was 25 years old, & I had never stopped writing poetry

Now I’m 28 & the mother of one daughter

I’m a bipolar poet & spoken word artist with HIV who knows that “perfection” is a just a myth

The possibility of me being perfect is right down there with me ever being a size 6

And every day, I still find a reason to get out of bed in the morning

I find a reason to smile

I leave pieces of myself on every mic I’m blessed to touch

My works are stories & life lessons disguised as poetry

These stories originated from my humble & dark beginning

These hard lessons are the mortar that holds my soul together

when my hands are too busy clutching the strength I need to make it to tomorrow

These poems I write…

These stories…

The most extraordinary thing about them is when they save…your life…

#diaryofadayumpoet

Death Becomes Her

*NOTE: This poem will be expanded, but this is just a preview*

You told me that my scars were much too deep
for you to take a chance at loving me
Because you know that it would be so easy
to drown in my circumstance

This was one of the most gentle ways 
I had ever been turned down
And as you continued to explain why you didn’t want me,
I finally understood
I mean…who wouldn’t be afraid of death? 
But even with this logic,
I couldn’t bring myself to stop crying
So hurt & ashamed,
I dragged my broken heart away…
As I blindly stumbled in the car,
I avoided my own reflection because,
at that moment, I didn’t wanna know what death…
looked like

#diaryofadayumpoet

"My soul bleeds…dripping into a flat line that has a conversation with Death about the life in me… #diaryofadayumpoet"

Melanie YeYo Carter

*Just a preview from some new shyt…And yall know I don’t share this side of me often*

“Let me strip to the sound of your heartbeat
Drop these emotional walls so you can witness the whole of me
And please…feel free to forget my name…
Twist your tongue & just call me your lyrical Mary Jane
& I will roll these haloed hips like kush to our melody
We will play fukk tag with our souls
as we scream this…has…to be…IT
Our moans will echo like poetic scripture
So beautiful that, even in sin, they will persuade God to listen”

#diaryofadayumpoet

She spreads her thighs as if there were godliness within her walls..And with every grind..she’s just trying to save them #diaryofadayumpoet

"My heart itself is already in tangles. A web of nonsense
and a drawer full of necklace chains that I will never
have the patience to separate. I am sounds mixed with
different mediums of light. Six thousand eight hundred
dialects of flesh that I don’t have enough time to
translate into words. This dictionary of skin is unreadable and
Latin is dead because of what we never had the balls to
tell each other…"

Shinji Moon-   #dayumpoets

For my people who prefer reverbnation or those who would like to purchase a physical CD instead of the mp3, this link is for you… The mp3 download is $12 & the CD is $15… Spoken word… all the madness…& all the love…”Eloquent Misery”… #word

#poet #boutthatlife #theend

"My hobby is writing love poems about you that I kno you will never read… But I write you down anyway & chisel your memory into the confines of my notebook… Because fantasies are safe there…& no one can tell me that you don’t want me anymore #diaryofadayumpoet"

Melanie YeYo Carter